


A Beast in Prince Clothing

by Kenunot



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-07
Updated: 2019-09-07
Packaged: 2020-10-12 01:20:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20555864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kenunot/pseuds/Kenunot
Summary: Dimitri wanted his professor by his side even if it meant she was just another ghost haunting him, he never thought how terrible it would be if she came back alive.





	A Beast in Prince Clothing

**Author's Note:**

> I really like Dimitri and just really wanted to explore his emotions during the reunion at dawn.

A beast roams the ruins of Garreg Mach Monastery, a beast with a thirst for the blood of men in Imperial armor. Both the beast and monastery used to be of great importance until the war with the Empire ripped that importance away from the both of them. The beast was the crownless prince of Faerghus a man just as cold as the country of his birth, however that wasn’t always the case. Much like the Monastery he inhabited he used to be filled with laughter and light but both are just haunting grounds for the dead now. The ghosts of the dead haunted the beast tearing into him, leaving a hollow chill in him. The image of his father's headless body, the burning corpse of his step-mother, the screams of Glenn, and Dedue’s sad smile wrapped around him like a cold blanket. The dead wanted one from him and it was the blood of Imperial Generals and the head of that woman leading them. His ghosts screamed deafening his ears to the living, their images blinding the only eye he has left. The past five years he lived without his senses truly becoming a beast with only a taste for blood.

The only warmth the beast has felt in the past five years was when he slaughtered that woman’s followers and their blood painted his face red. It was the only time his ghosts were satisfied with him and would leave him alone. In the moments that the blood touched his face until the coldness crept up his back he felt some semblance of humanity. He felt warmth on his skin, heard nothing but his exerted breath and heartbeat from his hunt. Those brief moments were addicting almost like a drug, he has been living for those moments for the past five years. Yet this addiction had one downside because he finally had enough clarity to see the monster he had become. As he watched the trail of bloody footprints mark his path and felt the blood dry on his skin he always for a brief moment felt his sins choke him as he was forced to stare at the carnage he created. The young Prince Dimitri would have become horrified with what he had become. He would probably be sick maybe even cry in regret of all the death he had caused. But, that prince died five years ago in a cell in Fhirdiad and the beast found pleasure in his hunt.

While the bodies of his enemies did little hurt him, returning to Garreg Mach has in fact hurt him more then any stab wound he had received in the past five years. That is because Garreg Mach is haunted by the memories of his professor and made him wonder why she hasn’t joined his ghosts in tearing him apart. Whenever he killed an enemy he would feel his sins but it was never directed towards the act of killing, but what would his professor think of him in that moment. Maybe the reason that she refused to haunt him was because of the beast that was born five years ago. Did she think so lowly of him that this monster could not be the vessel for her revenge? His mind would always flicker back to her and that time they spoke about enemies still being people and how she would say“ I always find myself thinking of those I have killed.” and how he could care less now and how he enjoyed watching the light leave their eyes and the blood pour out of them. But he always found himself feeling sick when be thought about her because he knew she would hate him for thinking this way and his short time of warmth would be snuffed out by the memory of his professor.

His Professor's absence among his ghosts made him wonder if this was her very own special way of haunting him. She must be disgusted in what he has become or maybe she hates him for not finding her after Garreg Mach fell. She must have known how much he loved being with her and by keeping herself away she could hurt him just as much as he has and is hurting her. He remembers the day she disappeared almost as vividly as Duscur as both events changed his life for the worst.He remembers when all the armies pulled back after The Battle of Garreg Mach, and the panic he felt when he couldn’t spot her face in the crowd. He remembers not even hesitating to run out to find her when Felix started to cry that he saw her fall from a cliff. He remembers thinking that the fact that she wasn’t instantly haunting him as a sign that she must be alive. How he searched through the rubble of the areas surrounding the monastery digging well past the point of his fingernails ripped from his nail beds. He couldn’t even think of stopping because there was only so much time before the Empire would attack the monastery again. His old friends had helped him search he remembers how they all kept positive attitudes that they would find her how they didn’t dig as hard as he did, as frantically as he did. They even quit as soon as the sun started to slowly rise. Then that hopeful note turned into a panic begging him to stop.How could he stop when their professor was still alive, he tried his best to ignore them and kept digging, he ignored the calls of your highness, boar, and the desperate last resort of Dimitri. He kept digging until Dedue finally stepped in and ripped him away from his mission. The old Dimitri cried and screamed as he was pulled away, he had to find her, he had loved his professor so much. He felt betrayed by his friends didn’t they love her, the woman that taught them all that they know who protected them with all of her might. Did they not also want to find her? But no they were selfish, only caring about themselves and their safety throwing their professor away like she meant nothing to them. He knew that she was alive, and they were killing her by walking away, so he screamed and he cried almost as much as when he was dragged away from Duscur. He screamed and fought until his voice was gone he could barely see through his tears.

“ I’m sorry your highness, it’s for your safety.” Dedue told him his voice thick with emotion as the old Dimitri passed out. He never had time to mourn the professor he was instantly thrust into the leading the Kingdom army against Edelgard. He thought that by dedicating himself to destroying Edelgard he could help the ghosts that were growing louder in his mind. He had become so engrossed in that goal that he didn’t notice how his country was betraying him until they killed him and released a beast on the world.

Ever since his forced exile and his return to Garreg Mach he has been plagued by the thoughts of the professor’s death being his fault. What if he was faster, what if he fought harder, would she be by his side right now? Would she agree with what he was doing or would she also call him a beast and look at him in disgust. He couldn’t didn’t want to think of her warmth and her smile that she directed at him becoming scorn. But in the halls of Garreg Mach it was all he could think about between the screaming of the dead. 

The beast truly didn’t know how long he had been at the monastery, it must have been a while based on the bodies piled up around the Cathedral . Another group of Imperial Soldiers had come to the monastery that day probably to investigate the deaths of their comrades and he had just spent the last 10 minutes slaughtering them all. He was now soaked in their blood and the dead have retreated in their joy. He felt so tired as his adrenaline rush passed and he felt his body slid down the wall on its own accord. His body ached from more recent wounds and his eye started to droop against his will. He hated sleeping, he’s hated the act since Duscur but had only gotten worse in the past five years. His nightmares plagued him making him wish he could just die when he woke up. Yet, he himself would never be able to rest if he got his revenge, he just needs to kill Edelgard and he could sleep forever. He didn’t want to dream, because even good dreams of a soft warm past were a nightmare now. Not only that but everyone tries to kill him when he sleeps, he’s never safe anywhere even under the goddess’s gaze.

He gripped his lance tensely as the waves of sleep crashed over him, but to his thanks his eyes had barely closed when he heard footsteps come up the stairs. It wasn’t multiple footsteps so it wasn’t more soldiers or the local bandits and he could hear them so it wasn’t an assassin. His body relaxed when it realized that the footsteps went very threatening but he kept the tense grip on his lance in case his instincts were very wrong. The beast actually struggled to open his eyes until the footsteps stopped in front of him as if waiting for him to look upon them.

As the beast opened his eyes flinching at the light coming through the tower he would have thought he was dreaming if his body wasn’t aching because the figure that stepped out of the darkness was his beloved professor. If he ever had to put an image to the goddess it would be her in that moment as she reached out to him. However, the image of her was too perfect, as if the past five years hadn’t touched her at all. He knew then that she must be here to jaunt him as well because the dead wasn’t he always made him happy the first time he saw them. His father smiled at him, his step mother hugged him, Glenn patted his back all before the image distorted and they latched onto him. She would be just like them perfect in the moment but as soon as she touched him she would become distorted and cold. He felt stupid for ever believing that his professor would never haunt him.

“ I should’ve known that one day you would come to haunt me as well.” he told her ignoring the hand that she offered him to stand up on his own. He wondered what her demands for him would be now that she was dead. When she was alive she never demanded anything from him and he felt strucken by a memory of himself asking him what she wanted from him and just saying “ All I ever want from you is to be the best Dimitri you could be.” For a woman who used to be so emotionless she always knew what to say to him to set his heart a blaze. He always wondered if she knew how happy she made him, but this wasn’t his breathing living professor anymore. She would have her demands, most likely to kill Edelgard like all of the others and he would do it because he loved her and he couldn’t save her.

“I will kill that woman, I swear it. Just don’t look at me with scorn in your eyes.” she averted her eyes from him to look at the ground as if she was contemplating what he just said. Did she not want that woman’s head? Then what did she want his own for not saving her for penance of being a monster? Yet, she still didn’t make a request she just reached her hand out to him making him flinch back. He wasn’t ready for her to turn cold to him, he couldn’t handle that.She only hesitated for a moment before she continued her movements and caressed his cheek

“ Everything will be okay” she whispered to him with a gentleness he did not deserve. He was expecting to feel cold as her hand went through him but all he felt clamminess of her hand and the little scars she had from years of wielding a sword. More than that, her hand burned him hotter than any flame, almost as if the crest she bore was the source of her heat. He flinched away from her when the feelings registered in his brain.

“ You… You can’t be? You’re alive.” he felt his chest get tight and a pressure behind his eye make him want to break down into tears. He couldn’t understand how she was in front of him right now alive. Why did she not come back sooner, if she was truly fine and unharmed why did she abandon him when he needed her most? Did she abandon him because she felt like he abandoned her when he couldn’t find her? His guilt was burning him even hotter then her hand, and then that guilt burned into anger and paranoia. Did that woman capture her and brainwash her, send her here to get close enough to kill him? If she was here to kill him she was just another tribute to satisfy the dead’s blood lust, she could die for all he cared he’d kill her himself if she betrayed him. Yet, the more he thought about killing her the more his heart hurt and the more he felt his eyes get closer to finally watering. 

“ That can only mean you are another Imperial spy. Did you come here to kill me?” he hissed bringing his face closer to hers. She flinched back from him the shock on her face more apparent then he had ever seen it before. More than that she looked so hurt that he would think that, and he could care less he wasn’t gonna die just because the old Dimitri loved her.

“ How could you ever think that, I would never be able to kill you.” her voice shook as she spoke, and he found himself actually believing her. She reached out again to touch him and he pushed her hand away with a scoff. He couldn’t stand the way she was looking at him, the pity in her eyes. She had walked up here she must have an inkling of the beast he had become. She should hate him, be disgusted by him yet she’s trying to comfort him as if he wasn’t the person that just hurt her. He wanted her to hate him, why can’t she just hate him he’s a monster a beast. In that moment he felt like a huge cavern had appeared in front of him separating him from the professor. She wasn’t acting like the professor in his mind the woman in front of him felt fake in contrast. Did he truly not know his professor that well, all of her lessons that went against what he was doing and she only looked at him in sadness. He needed to get away from her he thought he couldn’t handle her hated him well her pitying him was 1000 times worse. He needed to get away from her before she made him drown on his own sins. He would not let the living interfere with the dead’s tribute not even his professor. He walked away from her brushing against her roughly in the process hoping she got the message to leave him alone. She can’t judge him if she can’t see the full picture of what he had become, and he wouldn't have to face the heartbreaking fact that things could never be the same between them anymore. That her smile would never be directed at him, that her praises would turn to scorn and she would try to pull him off his path of revenge.

“ Dimitri, I’m glad you are safe.” her voice cut through his thoughts like a knife making him stop in his tracks. The sick twisted part of him wanted to laugh at her, wanted to yell all the pain he has been through, describe in great detail all the men and women who have tried to kill him over the years. How naive could she be to think that he has been safe during a war. However, the tone in her voice kept that in check. He wondered if she was blind or just naive to the fact he wasn’t even Dimitri anymore. Her student who she liked to ruffle his hair and made wishing of staying together forever died years ago. He hasn’t even heard his own name in the past five years, but she acts as if only a day had passed and she hadn’t encountered a monster wearing his skin. But, as he opened his mouth he couldn’t say anything that he was thinking.

“Am I safe?” he questioned her, his voice sounding so tired even to him. He had more important things to do now he should kill those rats before the professor ran into them. He wouldn’t be able to sleep now, the sun was rising and his mind was racing a mile a minute. Not only that but his ghosts had started to whisper in his ears again slowly regaining their volume. But, as he walked away from her he thought he heard her answer his question “ You’ll be safe. I’m here now.” and those words chipped a piece of him away because life wasn’t a fairytale and even his beloved professor couldn't turn a beast back into a prince.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading I hope you liked it :D.


End file.
